Rules + Regulations
- MAE
- Feb 10
- 6 min read
Updated: Nov 7
Instructions:
Hidden somewhere in the text below is an extra word that doesn't belong. Once you've carefully reviewed this page, please enter that word at the bottom to confirm your understanding and agreement to MAE’s Rules + Regulations
We do not believe a truly 'safe' play space exists anywhere in the world... but at MAE, we endeavor to come as close as possible to that safe space.
This endeavor requires your participation, adherence, and unconditional alignment with the policies and values below. Deviation or failure may result in either warnings or dismissal. MAE reserves the right to withhold the reasoning behind any dismissal should we feel it necessary to protect the community.
The reason why we might not provide reasoning that we do not want to make it easier for predators to hunt. If they learn what doesn't work it helps them find what does work to get in to our community and others.
That said, we are committed to helping each other learn, by and large we will aim to explain dismissals or expulsions.
Health
Feeling Unwell, Unsure, Under the weather?
Whether physically or mentally — a sore throat, or sniffles, dejected or angsty, anything — we ask that you abstain from the party. Put yourself and your needs first. A party at MAE is not a place to burn off steam or realign. It's a place to pursue, experience and learn, the right body and mind-space is required for such things.
Mandatory STI Testing
To see MAE play, all guests must submit verified STI test results from within three months of the event — even if they do not intend to engage sexually.
Required tests include:
Oral and genital gonorrhea (throat swab required for oral)
Chlamydia
Syphilis
HIV-1/HIV-2
Please ensure your provider includes oral gonorrhea testing, as some labs exclude it unless specifically requested.
→ Submit your results HERE.
→ Find STI testing resources HERE.
Remember: No screening makes an event “safe.” Regular testing and discussion of STI's helps destigmatize the culture around healthy sex rather than safe sex.
MAE does not ask for HSV results. If this is a concern to you we encourage you to have a friendly and frank conversation with whomever you are playing to discuss your status. There is a zero tolerance policy around shaming anyone for anything.
Sexual Health Conversations
Before any sexual activity, take a moment to discuss and disclose health practices and boundaries. It could be as simple as requesting protection during oral play or asking partners to wash hands or rinse with mouthwash before playing with others.
Condom Policy
Condoms are required for all penetrative acts unless you and your partner are fluid-bonded and have made an informed decision together. Switching condoms between partners — and between different types of play with the same partner is expected.
Hygiene
Washings hands and genitals in one of the party's showers is highly encouraged in between partners to help you reset mentally and physically for your next interaction. To lower STI risks, avoid brushing or flossing teeth immediately before or during the event.
Toys & Equipment
Please clean and sanitize all toys and equipment after use. Use condoms on shared toys. Remember: silicone-based or blended lubes for non-silicone toys; water-based for silicone toys and general use.
Privacy
Confidentiality & Privacy is Sacred
Everything you experience here — identities, conversations, locations, moments — stays here. Violation of this rule will result in legal action.
No Photography
Phones stored. No selfies. No recordings. No posts.
Phone Use
Phones must stay stored with your personal belongings. If you must use your phone, do so discreetly in the designated belongings area.
Need a way to keep time, or take a connection's information? Bring a paper and pen, and a nice timepiece.
Safety
(MAE's) Keepers
Keepers, easily recognizable by the illuminated laurels on their head are here to keep our space respectful and aligned. They are empowered to pause scenes, mediate issues, and ask attendees to leave if necessary.
You will not find justice at MAE when dealing with disputes or common drama found when humans gather in a social setting. MAE has two goals: compassion, and accountability. We will protect our community while adhereing to it's laws (changing them if and when we find cause to), and will do so with as much compassion as possible while also holding people accountable for their actions.
On-Site Medic
A licensed medic (not a volunteer or participant) is present at every gathering, connected to the protectors via walkie-talkie, ready to respond to any need.
The Calm Room
The Calm Room is your refuge — a no-play space to decompress, recharge, or receive mental/medical support when in need.
Raising Concerns During the Party
If something doesn’t feel right — whether it’s a boundary issue or feeling someone may be too intoxicated — seek out a Keeper immediately. We encourage the assumption of positive intent, while trusting your intuition.
Reporting After the Party
Even after the party, if after review you feel that something is off, please report it.
→ Report an issue here.
Consent
(Watch this short 3-minute video before continuing.)
Explicit & Enthusiastic Consent
Consent must be unmistakably clear, enthusiastic, and mutual — in both words and body language. Hesitation, discomfort, or ambiguity are signs to pause and check in.
People, especially women, report often having or engaging in sexual activity because they are willing and not wanting. At MAE we want everyone to want it. So if there is anything short of a 'fuck yes' or an 'abso-fucking-lutely' or a 'please let's do this!' it is an automatic no.
Willing is not enough, you have to want it, my friend.
Consent is Dynamic
Consent can be given, changed, or revoked at any time.
Asking for Play
When you feel you are ready to ask another party to play we ask that you do so in an open way where you give your power up.
For example...
Don't ask if someone would like to play... instead... tell them that you would like to. Give them the power to dictate the pace without the pressure of giving a yes or no.
"Hey, I feel incredibly attracted to you and I'd love to play together, let me know if you'd like to."
Silence or a lack of response is the response cannon.
Receiving a "No" with Grace
A no is never a personal statement as to your value. It is merely a comment on incompatability.
Honor the vulnerability of the requesting party with the honesty of a no (when you feel it is not a match). You might say:
"No, thank you."
"No thank you, but I'll come and find you if I decide otherwise."
"Not tonight, but I might be open to connecting in the future."
If someone persists after a "no," or violates a boundary such as you telling them you'll find them if you want to play, inform a Keeper immediately.
Proactive Communication
Express your desires and boundaries clearly:
"Hey, what are you in to at these parties? Can we talk loves, likes and limits?"
"Let’s make out and see how we feel, checking in along the way?"
"I’m looking for a gang bang tonight — open to vibe checks!"
Traffic Light System
Use simple verbal cues:
Green = All good
Yellow = Check in
Red = Stop immediately
Casual Touch
At MAE, even casual touch deserves conscious consent. A hand on a back, a lingering graze — it all lives on a spectrum of comfort, history, and meaning. Assuming it is not okay to touch someone, even if you feel you're receiving signs of an invitation for such action.
When in doubt, check in.
Navigating Casual Touch
Touch feels different based on:
Placement: (Back vs. lower waist)
Duration: (Fleeting vs. lingering)
Pressure: (Light brush vs. firm grip)
Reading Cues
Signs someone might not be comfortable:
Stepping or shifting away
Breaking eye contact
Crossed arms, closed-off posture
Touch & Flirting
Flirtation can invite casual touch, but interest must always be mutual. Please, be direct! If confused, a friendly question goes a long way. When unsure, ask:
“Hey, are we flirting right now?”
"Is it okay if I sit closer?"
Checking In After Touch
If you forgot to check first, you still can:
"Was that okay?"
"I should have asked — are you comfortable?"
Responding to Unwanted Touch
It’s okay to redirect with kindness:
"I’d prefer not to be touched — thanks for understanding."
"Love talking with you, but no touching for now."
"No worries, but I’m keeping my night hands-free."
Examples:
Overcrowded spaces: “I know it’s tight, but please no touching.”
Setting a clear boundary: “Enjoying this convo, but please no hands.”
Slowing down flirting: “I'm into this vibe, but let’s slow the physical side.”
Above all, MAE is about conscious, courageous connection. Thank you for helping us build a space where we all feel seen, honored, and free.
Love always,
MAE
